Almost anywhere we go in this world there is a message being sent to us, from ourselves, from society. The message encourages us to be something different from what we are. The message simply says ”…you are not enough!” It can sound like “You can work harder”, “You can do better”, “Do more”, “Do less”, “Do it another way”. As if what we do and what we are is not adequate.
We are encouraged…to work harder and do better as if we must “be someone” to deserve our existence.
The messages of doing better often comes from media but many times also from the people around us and from ourselves. We reward the fighters, we give them a pat on the shoulder and say, “You work so hard, keep it up, you are the best”. We are encouraged to encourage to work harder and do better as if we must be defined with a superlative and “be someone” to deserve our existence.
I believe it is important to encourage to do good, to do better, to do something different. I also encourage the people around me. What we all must remember though, is that what is our intention with our encouraging words might not be what the receiver of the message understands. We are individuals in different situations in life with different personalities and what encourages me might not encourage you in a positive way. Maybe even the opposite.
Encouraging words with destructing results
For me, encouraging words work very well if the intention is to put wood on an already burning fire. I hear the words, mostly they make me happy and encourages me to do more. But the thing is, most of the time, I am already pushing myself. When I hear words like, you are such a hard worker, you are the best I want to prove that these words are truth. Of course, I want to live up to the image other people have on me if they are raising me to the sky. The words might have an effect on me that was not the intention. They might even be destructive.
…my freediving has become something for show of. Something that has to do with numbers instead of being a pure passion…
When it comes to freediving, for me, these are the moments when my passion becomes a platform for prestige. All of a sudden, my freediving has become something for show of. Something that has to do with numbers instead of being a pure passion born from the pleasure of being embraced by nature. It was not because of numbers I started freediving. It was because of what I felt, being a part of the endless sea.
I am aware of this and how I, as a person, reacts to encouraging, uplifting words and positive feedback. Still, it is sometimes hard to resist that a part of me that wants to show of and live up to the image. Everyday I have dialogues and discussions with my self about this. I remind myself that I am enough even though I do not hold my breath for more than 5 minutes or swim 100 meters without fins.
To be is enough
I guess I am not alone with these kinds of reactions. Even though we are all unique we are often very much alike. We, the society reward those who fight, those who “become someone” in life. Many of us want to be that someone, to be seen, rewarded and praised. Therefor we want to live up to these words and this image. To be the hard working and the best, the deepest, the coolest. I can go on with superlatives but let me stop there. Because to be is enough.
Let encouraging words inspire you but do not let them make you a slave to your own or other people’s expectations.
There is nothing to prove
I have friends who are living lives different from mine. Sometimes I feel that they almost excuse themselves for living the life they live being happy with it, because it is a life not necessarily described with superlatives. I have heard words like: “I also want to be passionate about something to be more interesting”. And those who desperately are looking for their passion to find a meaning with life. Life is not about being someone by working the hardest at the office, diving the deepest on one breath, or doing the most interesting journeys. It is about love.
Life is about loving what you do and be satisfied and happy with it. If that means waking up with your family every morning or diving the deepest doesn’t matter. Let encouraging words inspire you but do not let them make you a slave to your own or other people’s expectations. We just have to be who we are. We have nothing to prove, not for ourselves nor for others. We don’t have to fight to deserve our existence.
Remind yourself about that sometimes. For sure I will remind myself many times more.
Be kind to yourself, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-03-19
Have you ever reflected over how much expectations from yourself or others affect your life? Do you ever feel limited to change or move on because of a situation or relation? There are so many of us putting ourselves in situations that are limiting to us. And the limitations creates a feeling of being disgruntled as they cover life as heavy cloud on a mountain top.
Every single second we become something new. We must let go of our expectations based on the past.
Even though some situations such as relations tend to make us feel unhappy we seem to be stuck there. We are someway trapped in a status. In a relation it might be called best-friends, marriage, brotherhood or sisterhood. We seem to be stuck because we expected the relation was going to last forever, and a changed status of the relation is considered to be a failure. In many relationships there are norms and oftentimes written or unwritten rules that create these expectations on us.
We all know that kids grow up, they change. Yhey change interests, they change in knowledge and develop every day. They even remarkably change in appearance. We accept all this as a natural part of growing up. On the other hand, when it comes to “grownups” we seem to expect us to be like Bilbo’s trolls, but instead of turned into stone by daylight we turn into stone by adulthood.
During the whole life, we change. This is something we must accept. We must accept that we are developing just as we accept kids as they develop. We cannot expect from ourselves, nor from others, to be the same person as one year ago, one month ago or even one second ago. We cannot either know what we will become. Every single second we become something new. We must let go of our expectations based on the past and just accept what we become every moment of life. We must be dynamic.
That string is being strained and stretched until its breaking point and when it breaks it hurts.
Therefore, I think, it is not always easy to be static in one certain place, in one way of living or to be attached to certain people. To be able to evolve we must either to surround ourselves with people who has no expectations and accept the way we are and what we become. Or else, there will be friction and tension creating a struggle in life. The whole world is ever changing. Having attachment to something or someone, for me, is like a thin piece of string that prevent the natural development. That string is being strained and stretched until its breaking point and when it breaks it hurts. Sometimes the string completely hinder us to become what we could be.
We have to cut of this string and go on without pointless obstacles in our way. The signs, that reveal which way to go on our way, are everywhere but sometimes hard to see because of this string holding us back, not being flexible for the world in change. Without the string, without the obstacles, we can see and understand the signs more clearly and follow them as they invite us to something new.
Find a way
I believe in living without this string, being free, without expectations. Then, nothing need to be forced, I just need to accept what I cannot change. I believe in living every second, taking one step after the other and find my way with sensitivity.
Free life & freediving
I write about this as a reflection of my thoughts and a comparison to freediving. How I approach freediving oftentimes seems to work as a way of approaching life itself. Many times, I have learned to approach life through my experiences from freediving. This issue is nothing different. It can be compared to a dive.
Drop your expectations. Approach your dive and accept what happens.
Every moment the situation in a dive is changing. …from the countdown to officical top until being above the surface again. How I perceive a dive is affected from my approach towards it. In a dive it is important, at least for me, to empty my mind, drop all expectations from myself and others and be here and now. Every moment must be a moment of acceptance. The dive should not be forced just experienced with sensitivity. All the time I must be responsive for the signs that tell me to move on or take a new breath of fresh air. Every dive is a new dive and should be treated like a child with no expectations, acceptance and sensitivity. And the same goes for life itself.
Drop your expectations. Approach your dive and accept what happens, accept change. Do this with sensitivity and you will find your way.
Drop your expectations. Approach life and accept what happens, accept change. Do this with sensitivity and you will find your way.
Be kind to yourself, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-02-27
Every day I learn new things about the World. Every day I learn new things about life and my reality. I have understood more and more that we all live in the same World, but different lifes in different realities. The reality is unique for every single one of us. My reality is not the same as your reality. Your reality is not the same as any other’s. All of us are unique, and it is every single person’s own responsibility to live the reality they want to live.
It is your decision
What is important to know is that no one else can tell us what to do with our lives. The decision is our own. It is all in our own hands. No one can tell us what to do or where to go. It is every single person’s own decision. We have to realize that we have the power to create and live the reality we want to live. I don’t say it is always easy to make all these decisions, because whatever decision we make there is one thing we have to deal with. That is to face the consequences of the decisions we make.
People feel safe in pretending that there are limits of what they can do in life.
This way of thinking might upset people, but I think people actually like pretending being back bound not able to do what they want because of a job, a relationship, family or friends. People feel safe in pretending that there are limits of what they can do in life. When people understand that everything in life is possible, life gets to big…I guess. It seems that it is better to pretend that there are limits and restrictions because then no one will express any expectations on one self or the others.
Everyone has the choice to do what they want…and follow the flow of life.
A provoking life
I have understood that I provoke some people with these thoughts and the actions I take with this way of thinking. I chose to live free and do what suits me. Some people call it egoistic and irresponsible. Other people say that I am lucky and fortunate to do what I do. They say it in a way as if they could not do something similar, to fulfill their dreams. To do what they truly want. The comments about being egoistic, I can accept, if that is the word they want to use. About being lucky I don’t totally agree. Everyone has the choice to do what they want, to go where the heart wants and follow the flow of life. Again, I don’t say it is always easy to face the consequences of the decisions. Many of us are too attached to places and people. These choices have not only been easy for me, I have faced consequences and dealt with some so far.
What is interesting is that I have seen kind of the same situations in freediving. People feel safe when they come to the training session and say; “I feel a little bit tired today…I will not do a hard training”, “Oh, I ate to much before the training…I cannot do a longer dive”. “My throat is a little bit sore…I think I will take it easy” When they say that I guess that they escape from the situation of having expectations on themselves or expectations from others doing extraordinary things. It is totally ok to not have expectations, everyone does not have to do the longest breath holds or do the longest dives or climb the highest mountains.
Life is now
But, if I at the same time say it is OK, why do I bring it up? It is because people seem to long for something else than their actual reality. They long for something different, adventures, nature…life. But, they seem to think that the possibilities in life are limited. Instead of living the life they want, maybe in a different way they indulge in other realities such as series, and social media on daily basis. Some people seem to want to escape the biggest part of the reality living for only a few moments in life. The consequences of making a change in life seem to be too hard to deal with. Therefor people pretend there are distractions in their way to fulfill dreams and live life. People pretend, and this becomes their reality.
…there are infinite opportunities and countless paths to go.
In my opinion life is too precious to be lived that way. I think life is meant to be lived every day, every second. Life is meant to be lived fully, every moment. People seem to lose life in the chase of life, “the perfect moments”. What is true is that the perfect moment is now, now and now. We need to wake up, make a decision and live.
Life no limits
Remember, you are in charge of your own life. No one else can tell you what to do. The decision is yours. In this life there are infinite opportunities and countless paths to go. You are the one in charge, you are the captain of your own ship. What you have to do is to make up your mind and live a life with no limits.
Be kind to your self, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-02-16
During 2019 I spent a lot of time in the water. That is something that truly shows on the photos that are taken during last year. Some of the photos I have shared on my blog and also at my Instagram account @nicoleedensbo. In this post I present the second part of “Top photos from 2019” and the photos that have been the most appreciated together with the story behind it. I hope you like it!
This photo simply shows the birth of a dive…
This photography is taken during a training in Kalamata. The circumstances for depth training in the bay were amazing. Normally the conditionsto expect were similar to a bath tub. No waves, no currents, just a little bit deeper than a bath tub though. If you ask me what I like about diving it is the whole experience, from waking up in the morning with the mind focused on this one performance and the feeling I bring with me. For me, this photography truly says more than a thousand words. This photo simply shows the birth of a dive and the immersion that have already started.
Beauty of Greece
The early autumn sun was shining on us as we explored the southern parts of Messinia. We were looking for a beautiful place and what we found was more than one beautiful place. On our trip we stopped several times to breathe the ambience of Greece. We were amazed by the beauty. The magnificent mountains with its calming even so intense atmosphere. The playful sea inviting us as it perpetually showed itself behind the sharp rocks. The olive trees thirsty for water were everywhere, playing with the light, throwing shade under their silver colored leaves. We found the beautiful place. We found the beauty of Greece.
…the beautifully sandy bottom and the crystal clear water were almost irrestistible to not make a photo.
In the search of darkness
Another trip in the search of underwater caves in an area called Lakonia. This photo is taken on our way to look for the caves. It is not easy to see but in my left hand I am holding a torch, ready to face the dark of the world in the shade. I guess the beautifully sandy bottom and the crystal clear water were almost irrestistible to not make a photo. This time we didn’t find any big caves, but we had a beautiful swim and many playful dives in the underwater landscapes. We also had the opportunity to take a beautiful photo of a lion fish and its magestic fins with its amazing patterns.
Where the sky meets the sea
During late October I had the opportunity to spend some time with the team members of Freedving Club Greece. The summer had turn into autumn. By the waters of Kalamata harbor the waves were splashing on the concrete foundation of the pier. One of the team members is from my neighbor country, Finland. Nestori is a talented photographer, he was behind the camera as this photo were taken. So, where am I pointing? I am pointing at nothing and everything. I am pointing where the sky meets the sea. I am pointing at the endless horizon.
I enjoyed every single moment of these training sessions, being in my element. Being free.
This photography is taken after a training session in Kalamata. I did a deeper dive and during the time waiting for the others we amused ourselves by taking photos in a glittery costume. In the upper corner to the left you can actually see the boat on which the set up for deeper was and a little bit further down a darker spot, which is a weight set at five meters for those who prefer breathing air with more oxygen after a dive. I enjoyed every single moment of these training sessions, being in my element. Being free.
Do you want to read more?
Have you also read the first part of this series? You find it on the on the link below:
Top photos from 2019 – A story behind: Part 1
Be kind to your self, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-01-29
During 2019 I spent a lot of time in the water. That is something that truly shows on the photos that are taken during last year. Some of the photos I have shared on my blog and also at my Instagram account @nicoleedensbo. In this post I present the photos that have been the most appreciated together with a story behind it. Enjoy!
This photo is taken in the southern parts of Peloponnese, Greece, in the peninsula called Mani. Mani is one of the most beautiful places on earth with its, somehow, penurious and at the same time so rich and magnificent landscape above the surface. The landscape under the surface was also magnificent and we found an element that was not originally a part of the underwater landscape but created by human hands. At -12 meters there was an anchor bigger than any anchor I had ever seen with which we made some extraordinary shots that can be found on my blog and my Instagram account.
The Calypso Deep has a depth of 5,267 meters. “…speaking of magnificent landscapes.”
Speaking of magnificent landscapes, I found a place on Earth where I for sure will go back to explore more. This photo was taken while exploring the Ionian Sea on the western part of Peloponnese. The rocks were steep, entering the water creating arches, underwater caves and depths hard to reach with one breath. Not far from here the deepest part of the Mediterranean Sea is situated. The Calypso Deep has a depth of 5,267 meters. “…speaking of magnificent landscapes.”
The editing of this picture creates and abstract image with room for fantasy and imagination.
When looking at this photography one can almost believe it was taken during night time with the moon light shining through the surface landing on the back of the monofin and the back of the diver’s body. That was actually not the case. The photo was taken with the sun in the middle of the sky, in the deep blue waters of Kalamata. The photographer has done an amazing work though. The editing of this picture creates and abstract image with room for fantasy and imagination.
This was one of the first photos Bastien took of me. We met during the Depth World Championship in Villefranche sur Mer, France. We had a great connection which ended up in a lot of experiences together. This photo is taken in the Peloponnese, Greece when barely knew each other. I wanted to jump into the water but as it shows, the water had quite a lot of movements and the visibility was not the best. We stayed above the surface and Bastien had a clear vision in his mind and I think we achieved just that.
One can almost feel the movement of the water and touch the intensity of the situation.
National Record Dive
Quite exhausted coming up from a -77meter Free Immersion (FIM) dive. To be honest, this was not one of my favourite dives when it comes to diving experience, but I did it. I broke the Swedish national record in FIM. I did this dive after three months of intense freediving training and competitions including the World Championship in depth. My feeling truly shows in this phography; exhausted but relieved. I love the dramatic scene of the whole image from the weather conditions to the facial expressions. One can almost feel the movement of the water and touch the intensity of the situation.
Do you want to read more?
If you want to read the second part of this series just click on the link below:
Top photos from 2019 – A story behind: Part 2
Be kind to your self, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-01-25
Do you ever find yourself lost in time and space doing what you love? Have you ever fully entered the world of your passion? What is your true passion?
What is important?
Maybe you have never thought of that, or maybe you have. Maybe you have found yourself thinking of what your true passion and purpose in life is but not finding the answer because the time ran out. The time ran out because there was work to do at the office, or you had to go to buy that shirt for this dinner or you needed to create that outstanding post on Instagram.
We lose touch with ourselves in this machine called life.
Our minds are so occupied by everything happening in the world around us. We find it so important that we don’t prioritize time to discover ourselves. There are too many impressions that distract us from being able to hear, listen to and consider our own voice with its message. Work seems to be more important than living our own lives. Status and relationships overshadows our individual needs. We are so busy to create and realize the image of a perfect life we think we are supposed to live that we forget about ourselves. We lose touch with ourselves in this machine called life.
It is your choice
I would say it is rare that people follow their voices, their passion and their dreams because of the structure of the world we live in. The thing is just that no one except our selves can know what that voice is telling us. We are fully responsible for our own lives and cannot blame anyone around us for the choices that we make. There are no musts in life living in this world. The only thing we have to be prepared of though, are the consequences of the choices and prioritizations that we do.
…maybe that is…what we need, to not have ha certain traced path in which we can go blind.
Though, doing something different, breaking the patterns of our society has a price. The different path is not as straight and clear as the one of the society. The path outside the map we know about might need more effort and awareness for every step taken. And maybe, that is exactly what we need, to not have ha certain traced path in which we can go blind. But one, where we have to keep our eyes opened and be present in every moment.
Realize your dream
I have talked to so many people that speak of their passion as a dream, and only a dream. Dreams that are not possible to live, that are not possible to realize. The thought of that the dreams are not achievable is because they know that everything has a price. Most of the time it is difficult to have the cake and eat it.
…your dreams will not be dreams anymore, but your reality.
Listen to this part inside of you as it speaks, maybe it is not loud, but it is there. Your true voice. It might be hard to hear it because if the noise from the outside world with its distracting blur of “duties”, “musts” and “media” of all kind. The voice of the world is so loud and almost unescapable. To find the quietness that we need from time to time there seems to be a deserted island needed to find peace and quiet. Start to pay attention and sooner or later you will hear it. The voice. Follow it, follow life.
What do I want to say?
What I want with this text is to encourage to live life. What I also want to say with thisis that everything is possible. I want to encourage you to live your life every moment. You just have to listen, be brave and believe and things will fall into place. When you truly believe your dreams will come true, and your dreams will not be dreams anymore, but your reality.
Be kind to your self, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2020-01-19
Within the freediving world there are people who have unique perspectives of life. I have had the opportunity to meet one of them. One of the most extraordinary persons I met, Stig Pryds. The words below are the words of Stig.
…it sometimes feels like life is trying to fit you in a box…maybe you don’t fit in this box…Stig Pryds
Screw the box
“it sometimes feels like life is trying to fit you in a box
school is putting you in a box
your job is putting you in a box
your insurance company is putting you in a box
maybe you don’t fit in this box
maybe you don’t want to be in this box at all
and the only way out is a dark road
it is not an easy decision to take
it is not an easy road to walk
but the feeling of being trapped in a box is just…
so you venture into the dark
and it turns out that the dark doesn’t hurt
your eyes adjust and you see where the road is leading
it often leads to a point where you have to take a leap of faith
or go back to the box
so you jump
the faith bit is not so much the leaping
it’s in the landing
the space between them can feel forever
but when you land – and you will
you will learn that the landing teaches you to fly”
Stig Pryds, Freediver
See the video Stig did together with the famous underwater photographer Daan Verhoeven – Screw the box. Visit Stigs website if you want to know more about him and his acheivements at www.stigpryds.com.
Be kind to yourself, be kind to others.
Nicole Edensbo, 2019-11-09